Strangers
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Ok, I was walking to school yesterday and about 2 blocks away from the bus stop, the damn bus comes passing me by...I say to myself "SHIT!"
So I’m about to walk past the stop and this car honks to me from the other side of the street. I look over, and it looks like my friend from home; so I go over there.
I found out that it is not my friend, rather an Italian looking dude who mistaken me for his friend as well. After we say our mistakes & I’m about to close the door he asks if I need a ride. Kind of freaked out, I think to myself "this isn’t the brightest idea...and I could be killed"
So I get in.
While in the car I tell him to go downtown and we start in on the small talk. Where we live, what’s our name, yadda yadda yadda. Then he asks me if I have a girlfriend. Now that’s weird to ask a stranger, especially if you’re a dude. I try to stay calm and answer "No."
Ask him the same. "Yep, she goes to school around here..."
Yeah...riiiiiight I think
And then he asks. "So....does that mean you have to masturbate yourself?"
!!!!! WHAAT. I think to myself "what the fuck did he just say?!"
Staying calm I say "I guess I do?"
He says “oh that’s too bad; it’s a good thing to have a girl friend to do that for you"
"Sure" I say.
And out of leftfield he asks "So...how big is your penis"
"WHAT THE FUCK DUDE!!!!!!!!!!" I scream in my head.
“I don’t know, about average?" I say. He’s like “so what’s average?"
He wouldn’t stop about talking about his fascinations with penises. I am kind of weirded out by these questions. So he keeps up the conversation. He starts naming off sizes...6 1/2
He says is what his 'friends' said was average. I’m like...ok? Sure that’s it. And for the whole ride he kept up with the penis talk. So I decide to change the subject. And I ask him where does he need to be or whatever. He responds "Sexworld"
Now I think to myself, “I am in a car with a man with a fetish for penis and a chronic masturbator"
So he finally drops me off at sexworld, 7 blocks away from my school.
Almost there, some bum comes up to me, asks for a cigarette. Tell him that it’s my last one. Then he lays his hand on my shoulder and asks to talk for a minute. “Whatever”
So now he starts preaching to me about how he’s not from around here and he is about to get his pay check and that honesty is the best way to get anything in the world. He asks for a dollar and I laterally give him my last one, and FINALLY I get to class.

So I ran into an Italian dude with a fetish for cock and pleasuring himself, and a bum who preached in my ear for about ten minutes about honesty.

….

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dont talk to strangers